Goddamnit.
Rose is going to chew my ass off for being late again, I thought as I hightailed it down the street that led to our cafe. It's not like I could help the shit but whatever, that's a whole other story to begin with.
Fucking Andy.
Just as I was about to karate kick the door open to go inside, someone ever so brightly thought that...'Oh, even though this door is noticeably intended for entrance — what with the huge 'Welcome' letters painted across the glass — I'm going to leave the cafe though it as I ignore the door that is literally ten centimeters away with the writing of 'Hope that you enjoyed your time with us, please come again.'
Fucking A, right?
So here I am, lying flat on my back as I gasp for air, while the ever so lovely Mr. Blue Eyes stands above me, gaping at me in some shocked as shit type of a way, like this sort of thing never happens.
Yeah, welcome to my life, dude.
After breaking out of his shock, a small laugh escaped the kid's throat, causing my expression of hatred to grow as I narrowed my eyes at him. "Really, you fucker? You're laughing at me?"
He grimaced as he quickly cleared his throat. "Shit, my bad," was his way of apology. "Are you okay?"
Dude was tall and skinny built, with blonde hair and bright blue eyes, hence my nickname for the kid, Mr. Blue Eyes.
Hmm, let me think, Mr. Fucking Blue Eyes…am I okay?
Oh yeah. Bella Swan is absolutely golden, man.
What?
Oh no, don't worry about me laying on this godforsaken dirty floor, which is probably bacteria infested. I actually take pleasure out of the filth that's eroding my clothing and would gladly do it as a pastime.
And, oh me, struggling for oxygen? No worries because that, is completely OKAY!
"Idiot."
He nervously held out his hand. "Sorry, man. I really didn't do it on purpose, let me help you up."
Oh shit. I said that out loud?
I pushed myself up from the floor, ignoring his assistance with a roll of my eyes as I brushed my ass off. "Nah, I'm good, man. Just do me a solid and read the goddamn door signs next time. No?"
"Yeah, okay," he whispered with a nod as I turned around and started heading towards our usual table, giving Emily — our personal goddamn Goddess of a waitress — a wink on my way. "No problem!"
Just as I suspected, Rose was sitting there with narrowed eyes, tapping her designer shoes against the floor. I walked up to her and took a hold of her face before giving her cheek a sloppy wet kiss, ignoring her annoyance with my tardiness. She growled at my 'affection' as she pushed me away from her and I snorted at her irritation, taking a seat across from the chick as I ran my fingers through my hair. "Well, Bella. It's about time that you decided to grace me with the pleasure of your company."
Meeting her slightly amused eyes that told me that the bitch was just trying to give me a hard time, I grinned as I reached across the table to steal a piece of her toast. "Sure, sure. Get over it already. It's not as if I did the shit on purpose, Rose."
She rolled her eyes as she grabbed a hold of her menu. "Let me guess. Those quote on quote parents of yours were giving you a hard time, right? I swear, Honey B. I don't know how you deal with all of their bullshit."
I nodded towards the empty chair that was placed next to her. "Where's Em?"
Emmett is my step brother and is honest to God, my best friend.
I simply adored the kid, to the core.
My Pop, Charlie, died when I was thirteen years old, and that scene that I didn't want to get into right now was seven years ago. My quote on quote mother, who goes by the name of Renee, remarried six years ago, showing me how perfectly she got over my Pop's death.
Right?
Anyway, Renee remarried Phil — a goddamn masterpiece, sarcastically speaking of course — who is Em's biological father. Really, though, I can't complain about it, because along with the 'brilliance' that is Phil, came Em, and he took my heart away from the beginning.
From the very first day that we met — with me not saying a word to him because I was still trying to deal with my Pop's death — to today, Emmett has been my rock. The God sent kid taught me how to drive — safety, how to play football with the guys — dangerously, how to make an otherwise healthy home cooked meal — unhealthy, and where to hit a dude to make him fall on to his knees — rapidly.
Basically, Emmett taught me how to just…live again.
I honestly don't know where I would be without him.
I remember everything about that afternoon when Phil brought Emmett to me like it was yesterday, and honestly, I don't think that I can ever forget the encounter. I was outside in my back yard on the swing, thinking about my Pop like I always did. The kid came up from behind and started swinging me, with absolutely no words exchanged.
Pushing me higher.
And I just got this fucking feeling, man.
I felt safe with him.
I didn't even know the kid and I felt like I could trust him with my life.
I didn't even know the kid and I felt like I could trust him with my life.
Something as simple and world meaning as that push that he gave me, and us not going through the awkward first introductions, it's unexplainable. It brought comfort into my life. The assurance of him, just being there whenever I needed him and knowing that he would do anything that was in his power for me, secured my being.
He was there, and I was there, and we were just…there, for each other.
Since that very first day, we've been inseparable.
The story goes on about how Emmett met Rose at the university that he was attending at, about three years ago. They both studied business and when they graduated — a little earlier than usual due to the two of them being smart as all hell — they opened up their own auto body shop right by the Rez.
I know that it might be a bit surprising to look at Rose and imagine her underneath the hood, because let's face it, she's point blank model status. But, man. This chick is a fuck awesome mechanic. And, I love that shit. It just goes against all odds and I adore the response that people get when they think otherwise. It takes the whole 'Don't judge a book by its cover,' to another level.
Anyway, Rose works at the shop whenever she gets a break from the club that her and I work at as bartenders, so Em basically runs the shit.
I think that they're perfect for each other now but back then?
Not so much.
When my brother left Forks for college, I was just…heartbroken. I spent my days and nights truly missing him. With his departure, shit turned to worse at the place that I once considered a home.
A home that Charlie built with his own work ridden hands.
A home that was tainted by Renee's new love interest, and destroyed.
When he came back to Forks last year, Em brought Rose along so that I could meet her for the first time after hearing so much about the chick. Little good that assembly or whatnot did because we, with no doubt, detested each other. I thought that she was a dumb blonde and she thought that I was a backboneless sarcastic bitch. It took us a physical altercation to be what we are today. I punched her in the face and broke her adorable little nose when she told me that I was just like my mother and the chick in return gave me one hell of a black eye when I told her that Emmett could do a whole lot better.
After that monstrosity, we ended up staring at each other for a good minute and a half with pressed tight lips before we just busted out laughing. I'll never forget the expressions that were written across Emmett and J's faces. They were honest to God horrified about what went down, looking at the both of us like we were truly insane.
And okay, we were. I mean, we still are.
But, I wouldn't have it any other way.
The fight that took place gave us the odd closeness that we have for each other. Odd being because we were both so completely opposite. No one could picture us as being friends, and close friends at that. But, I'd kill for the chick and I knew that she felt the same exact way about me.
A few months after Em came home, he moved out of the house and moved into Rose's apartment with her, thinking that I was okay with just living there with his father and my mother, thus taking all of my comfort with him.
He was so far from right, but he's happy with Rose, so I can't say shit.
Her right eyelid twitched after I asked her where Em was and as she looked away from me, I sat up a bit and placed my elbows on top of the table. "J is back at the Rez," she stated, avoiding my goddamn question. "He just moved back in with his Pop, we should go and visit."
"So, that is great and all but what are you not telling me, Rose?" I asked with narrowed eyes.
She rolled her own as she leaned back into her chair, placing her arms across her chest. "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just letting you know that Jake is back. I know that you miss his dog breath."
Rose and the dog — as she so puts it — have some twisted kind of a love hate relationship going on. I mean, they can tease each other to the point where people who don't actually know them believe that a domestic is about to take place.
But...
To people who do know Rose and Jake, we wouldn't be surprised to see Rose slay a bitch if said bitch did him wrong in some way. And, there would be no 'Holy shit!' if Jake decided to bury a motherfucker alive if said motherfucker made her cry.
I leaned back and placed my arms across my chest, already irritated. "You're a lying bag of shit, Rose. Why can't you just tell me instead of us starting right now?"
"Emmett is sick," she whispered. "He must have caught the flu or something. He's been in bed all day."
Complete and utter bullshit, I thought to myself as I kept my eyes on her while she avoided my own. It was obvious that she was hiding something from me, that twitch told me so, but honestly, man? Did I feel like putting up with it when I knew that I would have shit to deal with when I got home?
Not at all.
Emily came over to our table and handed me the delectableness that is the pancakes in this mother.
Food was now, in session.
Rose's bullshit, in intermission.
Time to goddamn feast.
With a wide smile, I grabbed onto the bottle of maple syrup and popped it open before pouring a hefty amount over my food. Noticing that Rose was staring at me in some kind of a way, I addressed her with a raised eyebrow, her creepiness irking me out. "Are you all of a sudden turning lesbo on my ass, Rose? Because if you are, I dig it and all, but...we have to find a way to tell my brother — without hurting his pride — that my vajayjay is better than his penis."
At my statement, the bitch started laughing, really loudly.
Like, obnoxiously loud.
I narrowed my eyes at her hilarity because my lady parts weren't that goddamn funny.
The whole holding onto the stomach act was excessive.
Finally, after literally wiping her tears away, she looked at me in some dreamy type of a way. "Honey B, if I were in fact seeking women, your brother wouldn't have been the one to turn me."
"How can you be so sure? I honestly wouldn't be surprised to find out that you're my secret admirer."
She smirked. "My assurance comes from your brother's finger lickin,' enormous, durable, delic—"
And, she gets cut off from there.
The chick bit into my palm after I reached across the table to cover up her mouth. My hand pushed her face away before I sat back down with a grimace that was caused by her sick ways. "Okay…point taken. I don't need a fucking visual."
Her smirk widened before it completely disappeared as I ran my sleeve across my mouth. After finding nothing, I shrugged and placed my arm in front of her face to show her that fact. "Clean. So, do I have shit anywhere else on my face? I mean, oh my God, Rose!" I teased in some high voice, mimicking her stereotype to piss her off beyond belief. "You need to like, tell me things like this! I can't like...walk around here looking like a total fool!"
"You're repulsive, do you know that?" she asked in all seriousness, pushing my arm away from her face.
I rolled my eyes at her chick ways before I started shoving food into my mouth. "Whah awe yah tawking abowt?"
"Can you at least try to eat like a fucking lady? You're going to give me a complex, for God's sake."
"Oh quit your complaining," I moaned, licking my lips and fingers. "It's fucking delicious."
And, screw the judgements that some of you may have of me for not using utensils.
I only tend to think logically, and in doing so, I find them pointless.
Let me ask you a simple question.
Didn't God grace most of us with digits?
Case closed. That's all I'm sayin.'
She looked at me like I was eating actual shit before she shook her head, pulling a magazine out from her purse. "And the food will still be delicious if it's eaten the right way and not treated as dirt, while you are its own personal vacuum cleaner."
I licked my middle finger before giving it to her. "Fuck off, Rosie."
Wait for it…
One…her glaring eyes snapping up to my joyful ones.
Two…her fingers over the magazine tense, nearly ripping the glossy paper in half.
"Stop calling me Rosie," she growled, disturbing the peace of the cafe. "Em and his fucking big mouth."
Mmhmm.
She despised that nickname with a passion.
Except, when it came out of my brother's mouth.
With a smile across my face, I picked up my fork to ease her distaste as everyone sitting around us rolled their eyes — seeing as to how they were accustomed to Rose's dramatics — before returning their attention back to what they were doing before. "Stop trying to change the subject, Ms. Priss. This is nothing new, I eat the way that I eat. Now, why are you eye fucking me?"
"WhenAreYouMovingInWithUs?" she asked quickly.
My hand froze — pancake midair. "Rose, you keep asking me the same goddamn question, and you keep receiving the same goddamn answer that I give you. I suggest that you drop the shit before I get pissed off."
Placing the magazine on top of the chair next to her, she frowned. "Come on, Honey B," she started. "I can't drop it. It's bugging the crap out of me that you're in that house with that fucking piece of —"
"I said drop it!" I yelled above a whisper, interrupting her. "Now."
She narrowed her eyes at my tone as she leaned back into her chair with her arms across her chest. I mimicked her stance and bypassed the narrowed eyes with a glare, dominating her goddamn gesture.
Yeah, so...this could take a while.
I highly recommend that you bitches get comfortable.
Rose was very patient in getting her point across. Her main characteristic in doing so was what people may know of as the 'silent treatment.' Her silent treatment consisted of pulling it out and making it last for months. Months of absolutely nothing. Months of her keeping it in, coming up with a plan, and finding a perfect opportunity to let it out.
And I, am as stubborn as they come. I don't care if someone is right about a certain idea that I've had in my head as being right for a long time, I'm going to argue about it with all of my being. And, that disagreement that I have about that certain topic may not be shown with back and forth fighting about it. Most of the time, I just don't find it worthwhile to go head to head. I can force myself to ignore you to the point of annoyance. I can sit there and listen to someone go on and on about what they think is correct and physically show them no interest. If I'm honestly pissed off at you because of some asshole thing that you did to me or to anyone who I cared about, I'm pissed off at you with all of my being until you fix it. And, apologize. If I have the answer in my head, it's the answer. And, sometimes, that answer can make complete sense to me at the beginning, but at the end, it may make no sense to me anymore, but I'll still go by it.
With all of that mentioned, I wasn't going to sit here and waste my time with her 'line of reasoning.' Plus, my pancakes were getting cold, so you know...I can't have that shit happening. Turning my attention back to my plate, I started cutting into my food. "Fuck off with that shit, Rose."
"Bella, I'm not saying this shit to start a brawl," she whispered as she stood up. Lifting my eyes from my pancakes, I watched her as she walked over to me. "But I'm also not going to sit around and act like it's nothing anymore."
"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked, my hand frozen as she bent down a bit to kiss my cheek.
"It means that I'll tell him," she answered in a whisper, placing my hoodie over my head as she straightened herself up again. "I'm sick of hiding all of this shit from him, Bella."
As she walked through the door, I growled and pushed my plate away, my appetite gone.
If he knew what was happening, the kid would end up in jail for killing a motherfucker.
Even if it was his own Pop.
Shaking my head to dismiss that goddamn predicament — which would only happen over my dead body, mind you — I stood up and threw some bills on the counter before I walked over to the counter to pay. Emily rolled her eyes before shooing me away and telling me that it was on the house, like always. I leaned over the marble and kissed her forehead before walking out of the cafe, deciding that a trip to Em's place was needed after I went home to get some soup, since he was sick and all.
As I stepped inside, I could smell the booze as if it was flowing through the air.
Amazing.
After locking the front door and turning around, I was met with Phil's familiar enraged eyes on me as if I was the cause of all of his problems. "If it isn't Ms. Isabella, gracing us with her presence," he slurred, standing up from his seat unsteadily. "Where have you been for the last two nights?"
I can never go five seconds in peace without this asshole harassing my nerves.
Honestly.
Give me a chance to walk into the goddamn living room, for once.
Avoiding his eyes, I lowered my head as I started heading towards the stairs. "Listen. I'm just going to go up to my bedroom and I'll be out of your way, Phil. Let's just…not, tonight. Renee knew that I was going to be out," I lied.
He stumbled over to me — too quickly for someone who seemed to be intoxicated — and grabbed a hold of my arms. After pinning me against the nearest wall, he hissed. "No, you fucking listen. Who trained you to talk to your father that way, you worthless whore?" My fingers tightened into a fist before I shook them out, trying to calm down as I remained quiet. "Tell me where the hell you've been all day and night!" he yelled...
Acting as if I was across the continent and not right in front of him.
I turned my head to the side so that I didn't gag from his booze induced breath as I closed my eyes. "I fell asleep at a friends house," I whispered. "Sorry, Phil. I promise that I won't let it happen again."
His hold around my arms left before he pushed me up the first few couple of steps, causing my knees to catch the brunt of his force as I fell. "Damn right, it won't happen again," he spat, dismissing me.
Reaching the hallway, I looked down and growled when I heard him start mumbling shit about Charlie, the insulting words leaving his mouth not as comprehensible as I hoped. As soon as I saw the asshole take a seat on 'his' chair, something inside of me just…snapped.
I ran into Emmett's old bedroom and took a hold of his baseball bat that rested against the wall below his window, the blinds left untouched since he left, open to the sunlight during the day and the stars during the night.
His eyes widened a bit as he saw me stumbling down the stairs with the bat raised above my head. As I neared the asshole, he broke out of his stun and stood up with a growl, snatching the metal out of my hands and throwing it over his shoulder. "You crazy bitch!" he yelled, tackling me down on to the floor before shoving his arm against my throat. "You want to hurt me, is that it?"
And here I am again, gasping for air as his body straddled mine. "Get o—off me!"
Christ. I can't breathe.
His arm lifted off of my neck and I inhaled something shaken, trying to catch my breath. "You silly girl, thinking that you had a chance of hurting me was pointless," he whispered, laughing at my discomfort as he used my body to push himself up to his feet. I went to stand, but the inconsiderate asshole grabbed a hold of my wrists and aggressively pulled me off of the floor, practically dislocating my shoulders. "Isabella, next time that you pull shit like that, I won't be as forgiving," he warned as he gave my one shoulder a hard hit. "Trust me."
I lowered my head as I started backing away from him, making my way towards the kitchen. As I ran my hand over my shoulder, I grimaced at the tenderness, knowing that his actions were going to leave me with some kind of a mark.
If you asked me why I did what I did, I wouldn't know what to tell you.
I just didn't find my Pop's name coming out of that asshole's mouth 'cool'.
The only thing that I regret about the shit is that now Phil knows how I react to it.
It will be his purpose in life to get that same feedback from now on.
Letting the kitchen door close in front of me after I pushed it open with my back, I groaned as I caught sight of Renee sitting on the floor, leaning against one of the cabinets that were under the sink as she held onto an empty bottle of rum with one hand, the other one tightly wrapped around a full beer can.
The routine, as I like to call it.
I walked over to her and slowly bent my knees, lowering myself down to her level. As I moved her hair away from her face so that I could see her better, I shook my head, trying to will my frustration away. "Hey, are you okay?"
To my guess, she didn't hear my question so I repeated myself, raising my voice a little. Her glassy eyes met mine a few seconds later and she laughed, taking a hold of my hand. "Oh, sweetheart!" the woman shouted. "I didn't realize that you were home. Let me — " she paused as she tried to stand, "let me get up and make you some dinner."
Right.
Like I'd actually enjoy eating food that would probably end up being burnt.
Sounds like a plan, mother.
I shook my head as I squeezed her hand. "No worries, I ate." Placing her arm over my shoulder, I pulled her up from the floor and rolled my eyes at the weightlessness of her body. "Let's go to bed, yeah? It's pretty late."
I guess that it's cool to go on 'living' with a diet that consisted of rum and cigarettes.
It must be the new motherfucking thing.
As we stumbled out of the kitchen, Phil's eyes left the TV that showed nothing but dust over the black screen. As he watched the scene of me pulling Renee towards the stairs with her nonexistent support, he laughed, tossing his head back in entertainment as he remained seated, not offering me any kind of help, even though I wouldn't take it.
Just the fucking thought that counts, you know?
After kicking her bedroom door open, I dragged her body over to her bed and laid her down on top of the covers. Walking over to her dresser to get her something more comfortable to wear, I stopped in my tracks as a picture frame that was placed against the wall caught my attention.
Number One Daddy, scribbled across the wooden frame in my messy handwriting.
My hands shook as I remembered the day that I gave it to him, earning me that genuine smile of his. I stepped a little closer to the wall and saw Charlie, Jake, and I fishing in one of the lakes at the Rez. I snorted, seeing the aversion across my face as I looked at Jake, who returned the displeasure of my company with narrowed eyes as my Pop sat down on top of a big rock, a grin hidden under his stach.'
I shook my head as I took a hold of the frame and lowered it from the wall. Turning it upside down, I placed it on top of the dresser as I opened one of the drawers and pulled out a pair of Renee's PJs.
Turning around, I cursed when I saw her on her side, passed out with her cheek in a pool of her own vomit. Placing the clothes over my shoulder, I shook my head as I walked over to her bed. After wrapping my arms around her waist, I dragged her off of the covers and then out of her and Phil's bedroom to head towards my own.
I laid her down onto my bed and covered her up with one hand as I turned off all of the lights with the other, deciding that I'll just leave her in here until I get back from Emmett and Rose's apartment. It wouldn't be the first time that this woman has passed out from drinking too much. It also wouldn't be the first of her waking up during the night to continue drinking into a slumber.
As I made my way downstairs, I smiled in relief when I saw Phil passed out cold.
Hallelujah, man.
After grabbing a can of soup, I left the dump that you guys had the chance of getting a glimpse of.
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